Tuesday, October 22, 2013
Light and Darkness
So I have been thinking a lot about Light and Darkness this week, because it has been an interesting first week after Transfers, and I have been trying to adjust to the new things that are happening around me. I expressed some of my concerns with President Pitt and he suggested writing down everything that I think and feel as the weeks go on. and I wrote down: Thoughts of Darkness seep their way in - on the weak and unprepared mind. Once it is in - it is hard to get out. The darkness consumes everything in its path. We all have a light - oh how feeble it looks in the Darkness, but that little glimmer brings us hope. We may be consumed in the darkness of the world, but we have our little light - our little light grows day by day and the darkness can not keep it away. Darkness has no power over the Light. So remember, this simple thing, Don't Put Out Your Light. A few days later we went to the Library because we are supposed to do Mormon.org twice a week for two hours. and I watched the Patterns of Light by David A Bednar. all three of the videos. And I was like my goodness this is basically what I was thinking, and feeling. Why doesn't God give us revelation and direction in everything that we do? for the longest time I felt like it was because I wasn't good enough for it, that I was doing something wrong. but that is not it. God does not need to command us in all things, because he TRUSTS us. How weird is that to think, that if you are living righteously and doing all you can to come unto God, that if you aren't receiving constant revelation on how to better live your life, it is because God Trusts you to make the right choice. God's Trust. That is one divine power of trust!
I also had a thought later on the song in Anastasia where Rasputin is singing 'In the middle of the night Darkness will find her.' and then the Lion King popped into my head where Scar is singing "Be Prepared!!!!" and I just thought Holy Smokes. The Dark Side of the Force is coming to get us! Their words of when they will come and get us, that they are preparing constantly to overcome us. Just waiting for that moment to be able to destroy us in our weak moments. It is crazy how much you can think of when you are thinking of Light and Darkness.
I also thought a lot about Anger and how anger doesn't get you anywhere. I thought of a quote by Ghandi, at least I think it was him... if not someone else said it: “anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else/ or burning someone else. The only person who gets burned is you”. I think Ghandi was right for the most part. Anger is like grasping a hot coal - you do get burned, but that hot coal is still hot when pressed against other. The longer you hold onto Anger the longer you will burn - the bigger the scar you will have when you let it go. There will also be scars on those that you burn along your path when you were in anger. So is Anger Really worth it?
We had Stake Conference Yesterday and there was a lot of inspirational things that were said. One that I really thought was interesting was the question: Would you die for the Gospel? are there some who need to live the Gospel before we die? If you don't Love the Gospel, you won't live it. Don't just believe and know it is true. Live it and Love it because you know. There are many gifts that the Lord give us, but who are we to reject those gifts. Many are called but few are chosen. And why are they not chosen? because they choose not to be chosen. If we accept what the Lord wants us to do - he will give us power to accomplish and do much more. Our Father in Heaven loves us the way we are but he loves us too much for us to stay that way. We are meant to be continually growing and loving. If we were meant to hit a stand still sometime in our life where we would know and understand all happiness, then we would stop learning or progressing. I want to continually grow and progress. Lucy, one of our investigators, told me: "You know what Sister Call, I like something about you. When you don't know the answer to something you don't just give me an answer, you look it up, and figure it out. A lot of people in other churches would just tell you what they think." I'm trying to understand this Gospel every single day of my life. and it won't end when I get off my mission. There is sooo much that I don't know, and at this moment can't comprehend, but I know eventually as I study it out in my mind, and ponder about it then it will become clear to me.
This week has been interesting with it's ups and downs, but I'm not trying - I am Doing. Do or Do not, There is no Try.
Love yah all and I hope everything is going well!
Sister Karen Call