Monday, September 30, 2013

Quick To Anger

Holla family!
So I learned a good lesson this week about my personality. I naturally have been very Quick to Anger. When people are beating down on the things I hold dear to me or they are being rude. I will not tolerate it. Unfortunately, that is not the solution. Anger will not get you anywhere close to the Savior and what he is teaching. It was really difficult for me as one thing after another started popping up. There was one particular moment this week the tip of the iceberg you could say, and low and behold a song popped into my head. And for those of you who don't know - complete songs don't pop into my head only choruses and stuff, but this entire song come into my mind.
Did You Think To Pray (Hymn #140)

Ere you left your room this morning,
Did you think to pray?
In the name of Christ, our Savior,
Did you sue for loving favor
As a shield today?

When your heart was filled with anger,
Did you think to pray?
Did you plead for grace, my brother,
That you might forgive another
Who had crossed your way?

When sore trials came upon you,
Did you think to pray?
When your soul was full of sorrow,
Balm of Gilead did you borrow
At the gates of day?

Oh, how praying rests the weary!
Prayer will change the night to day.
So, when life gets dark and dreary,
Don't forget to pray.

I instantly stopped being angry. It isn't going to get me anywhere. It isn't going to make me happy. It isn't going to move the work in this mission forward. There is no positive side to being angry. It just leaves you dark, cold, and bitter. This song has literally been with me every single day. Burning inside my mind. Did I think to Pray? was that my initial reaction to the whole situation? No. But it is stuck to me now. Having a prayer in heart for all of the craziness that is going on around me.

Anywho, lightness of this week. I found out I have an awesome sister that loves me :) Thanks Sherie for the Awesomeness of that package!! It made this week so much better! Everything about it lifted my spirits. Especially Will's Words of Wisdom/Advice. The "homemade taffy" was pretty good too :)              I also got two new nephews!!! YAY!! by the time I see them they will probably be walking around and saying random stuff that doesn't make sense, but hey they will still be awesome and cute!!

So last Monday Sister Richards and I went to the Portsmouth Murals. It is this huge dam wall that has the history of Portsmouth drawn on it. It took a really long time to see all of the pictures.  We found the Lamanites drawn on the wall :)  We had a lot of fun finding little mistakes here and there of spelling and different things. After we spent almost 2 hours there we headed home and got ready to go to dinner. We went to Linda, Jon and Kiteley's home and we had MEATLOAF!! not going to lie I was a little worried because I have never had meatloaf before. I have never tried it, because it sounds gross. Like come on! Meat? in a Loaf? Anywho, It was amazingly delicious....  of course... I guess hers would be called Meat pancakes or something because it wasn't cooked in a loaf. It was delicious and that is all I can say. We had an interesting conversation about spiders and snakes. What we are afraid of and such. Which then lead us into talking about God, and how he created all things :) We read Alma 18, because Kiteley has no idea who or what God is. She wasn't grown up with any religion at all and everything is new to her. It is really interesting to try and explain who God is to someone who has never heard of him before. I suggest you all try it some time. Later that night we went and saw Shawna, and she did something pretty nasty... She squished a spider... with her hand. She just smacked it! Oh good times.

On Tuesday we had specialized Training in Ashland. President Pitt and his assistants were there to teach us. One of the big points they told us was that we needed to work on was Unity. If you are not united in purpose - and this refers to everything in life that you try - then it will not work, or it will take twice as long to get things accomplished. The ward I am currently in Really needs to work on it's Unity.    The one thing that really stuck out to me was a talk given by Elder Holland The First Great Commandment October 2012 General Conference. We only watched the last bit of the talk. He told the Story of Jesus and his disciples how when Jesus was gone Peter basically said "well, we have learned a lot. Lets go fishing". How one night they were on the water and they hadn't caught anything all night and it was coming morning and someone on the shore told them to cast their nets on the right side. You can imagine them saying "who is this person telling us what to do?" but they did it and their nets filled so full they could not pull it in. At that moment Peter knew it was Christ. He jumped out of the boat and swam to the shore. Christ was there and he had made them breakfast. He Continually was Serving! Peter sat down and they began to talk. Christ turned to Peter and asked him "Do you love me?" Peter answered "Yes Lord I love thee" Christ asked again "Peter Do you love me?" Peter answered again "Yes Lord I love thee" Finally Christ said the third time "Peter Do YOU Love ME!" You can imagine Peter in his despair of Christ’s question and he again responded "Yes Lord I love thee". More than Fishing and Nets More than anything he had done before. From that time forward Peter became the great at working miracles. There is NO going Back. There is no leaving this Faith. You need to stay this course forever. You cannot go back.      Listen to the Talk.

I imagine the Lord asking me that question "Karen, Do You Love Me?" Everything I look back to, what I could fall back into doing come to mind. I realized - I Can NEVER go back. The desire and the thought of going back will stop me from my progression of moving forward. I Have to stop thinking of all of the negative things that hold me back and stop me from progressing. Negative thoughts aren't going to get me anywhere. I may not be the most scripturally versed, the most brilliant, the strongest in speech. I may not be able to run as fast, jump as high, or do things as well as others. But Hey, I'm not them. I am me, and I have to progress at the stage I am at to get there. I can't run a marathon in one day if I haven't trained for it. Well... I guess I could, but I definitely would not feel very good, or I would be passed out somewhere on the side of the road. We all have to start from the beginning. Some are naturally more talented than others. It's like the Parable of the Talents. Some are given more than others, but it all depends on what we do with our Talents that really matter.

We set Jaylene on date this week for Nov 9th. She is an amazing example of a someone striving to find the gospel. She realizes the happiness that it brings, and she is willing to sacrifice - her friends, her family. All for the truth of the gospel and what it can and will bring her. She has her head on straight and she is willing to go all the way to gain that happiness that is promised. Jaylene came to the Relief Society Broadcast this weekend and she also came to church on Sunday. It was her first time there! She thought it was interesting, but a little strange how school like it felt.

We also talked with Lucy. We taught about Faith and Repentance with her. She told us that she had a dream about her father and how it seemed so real. Like he was telling her it was Okay to get baptized and join this church. As we talked she told us the only thing that was holding her back now was that she could not forgive this man.  She does not feel worthy to be baptized if she cannot forgive him. Forgiveness is a hard thing for a lot of people. Including me. It isn't something that can be taught or learned from a book. The steps of forgiveness are there, but the actual forgiveness part is so much harder. Someday she will be baptized. I hope to be able to attend Jaylene and Lucy's baptisms.

I don't really have much else to say about this week. I have learned a lot about the importance of coming closer to the Lord. We need to Turn Outward instead of Inward. We must all seek diligently at this time to come closer to the Lord. the work is hastening. There is a sense of urgency, that some members are taking as a pushy feeling and do not like it. This is not the time to take offense. This is not the time to doubt. This is not the time to second guess all of what we have been taught. We need to walk to the edge of the light and then take a few steps into the darkness before the light can be illuminated again. Pray for this work, Pray for the people searching for the gospel, Pray for the missionaries that they may have the patience and faith to be able to find these people, and remember: Did you think to Pray? Along with Prayer we need to act. We cannot sit around and wait for things to happen. If you sit in a room all of your life asking God to send you friends because you are lonely, then nothing will happen. No one knows you are there. No one knows you need a friend. Sometimes miracles do happen, but they are usually after we show our Faith.

I Challenge all of you this week to Look up and work on the Christlike attribute of Faith in Jesus Christ and do everything you can to learn about it, and to apply it into your life.

God loves you, I love you, and everything is going to work out in the end. Continually press forward with a steadfastness in Christ and you will be blessed. Whether in this life, or in the Eternities. I do not know.

I love you all, be good, sorry if everything is so random,

Love Sister Karen Call

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