Friday, May 9, 2014

Falling Asleep Near Gethsemane

Holla Familia!
This week has been pretty good. Last Monday we went out to lunch with Laura- she is a lady we have been helping clean her house getting ready to move, she is a friend of a member in the ward. She brought us to a place called Lefty's It was pretty good. There were a bunch of pictures in the restaurant and they were all of people who were left handed, and the person who started up Lefty's is left handed as well... how crazy is that. haha
We also helped Sister Hendricks with the Primary School Carnival Fundraiser, she was having a hard time finding Volunteers to come and help out. Lots of members in the church stepped up to help out. Sister Maddox and I got to man the ticket booth for two hours. That was fun! We got to see a lot of people! so it was perfect on trying to get our name out there. The only down side... Half my body got sunburned, Ouch. It wasn't that bad, but I looked pretty funny haha. 
We also had Exchanges with the Blacksburg Sisters. I went with Sister Richards to Blacksburg and Sister Whitaker went to Christiansburg with Sister Maddox. Sister Richards told me to study about the Atonement to teach to a less-active family, the Crows, that we were going to go and see. I have been feeling a little down about things for a little while and have tried to rekindle, and this week I have learned a lot of things. I think it all started off at this lesson. I didn't really contribute much in the lesson, but I did talk a little about the Garden of Gethsemane. How a lot of churches focus so much on the cross, how his suffering and death was there. But in all reality thousands of other people during that time were crucified, Peter was crucified. That pain that was felt on the cross was not unique it was not the ultimate pain. It was during the Garden of Gethsemane. I read a few days earlier, I can't remember where right now, but about the pain that was felt in Gethsemane. That it wasn't just the Physical pain that he felt, but the excruciating Mental pain. Physical pain can be remedied and cured (most of the time), but Mental,Emotional, and Spiritual pain is not so easy. The feeling of Everyone's pains.  The Heartbreaks, fear, sorrow, depression, anger, doubt, and etc. Everything we have felt. Similar to the Spirit - It is said to be as a Still Small Voice, something you could say was a "physical hearing", but as Nephi speaks to his brethren about how the Spirit spoke to them "but they were past feeling". Christ suffered Physically, but he suffered Mental, Emotional, and Spiritual pain even more. Thinking about how his apostles were just a stones cast away, and they fell asleep. I just thought at that moment how we can be asleep to the blessing of the Saviors sacrifice for us. We didn't know that it was happening, didn't see it, didn't feel it. But it Happened, and even though we may be "asleep" to the reality that he made an infinite sacrifice for us, it is still there for us when we finally "wake up" and realize. and just as his apostles fell asleep several times. We too can fall asleep over and over again, but we continually wake up as well. Eventually that sleep will not come to us anymore. 
This thought also went with a talk that the Blacksburg sisters sent, "Converted Unto the Lord" by Elder Bednar. The difference between our Testimony and Conversion. Staying awake is that extra oil we put into our lamps, that conversion that we have. and there was a quote in it that I really liked and really stuck with me: 
"Were the five wise virgins selfish and unwilling to share, or were they indicating correctly that the oil of conversion cannot be borrowed? Can the spiritual strength that results from consistent obedience to the commandments be given to another person? Can the knowledge obtained through diligent study and pondering of the scriptures be conveyed to one who is in need? Can the peace the gospel brings to a faithful Latter-day Saint be transferred to an individual experiencing adversity or great challenge? The clear answer to each of these questions is no."
We can't have a desire to stay awake if there isn't that conversion. I think the difference between a Testimony and Conversion is desire. Testimony is what we say we believe in, and as we have a Desire to become what we believe in, that is when it becomes a Conversion. When we believe and desire to become and live and do as the Savior taught. 
I keep falling asleep. But as I learn more, and share more, my desire to stay awake grows. 
This week has been a real time of Pondering for me. I have a lot to do, and a lot to let go. A lot to remember. 
It was also a difficult week because Transfers is tomorrow, and I am leaving. I found out Yesterday that I was leaving. After being here for 6 Months... I guess it was time. I will be headed to Back Creek Virginia and my new companion is Sister Isobe!! I did exchanges with her in Ohio a really long time ago haha. AND guess what! Sister Richards is going to Vinton Virginia and she will be my STL again with Sister Canova! AH! I love Sister Richards and Canova! They are probably the two awesomest Sister Missionaries I know. I'm super excited. 
I hope all is going well with everyone back home! 
Happy Birthday Daddy! Hope you Heal well, and that the Garden and Boat get taken care of ;)
I love you all! Strive Constantly to live a more Christlike life! 

Sister Karen Call


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